"Success in any field, but especially in business, is about working with people, not against them." /KF, p.7
"The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated" /W. James
Connecting (="networking") = sharing knowledge, resources, time and energy.
Importance of mentors.
Don't keep score, keep giving. The idea is to be a giver, but be strategic about it. You also have to ask for generosity back. Networks are for mutual benefit.
What's your mission The importance of written goals and having people around you that can help you achieve those goals. 1. Find your passion (look inside, look outside) 2. Put goals to paper 3. Create a personal "board of advisors"
Examples: Bill Clinton being a master at "feeling your pain" and listening.
Build your network before you need it.
Be audacious: find a role model, learn to speak, take some risk, meet new people and different people
Do your homework: research beforehand and even tell people you have done your research.
Take names; make lists of helpful people and people you want to help. Friends, family, acquaintances, weak ties. Make a priority list 1,2,3.
1: contact each month, 2: touch base, quarterly, 3: once a year
80% success is just staying in touch; therefore have a plan.
"All successful people are planners. They think on paper. Failing to is planning to fail and a plan is a list of activities and names" p.197
Three modes: email, a phone call and a face to face encounter.
Pinging: "When it comes to relationship maintenance, you have to be in your game 24/7, 365 days a year." p.196
As you add names to your lists, don't worry right away about whether or not you can immediately connect to them. Mapping the landscape is where you start. Aspirational list.
Warm calling; 1. Mention a familiar person, institution, 2. state your value proposition, 3. Impart urgency and convenience, 4. compromise to secure a follow up
Good follow up: follow up is the key to success in any field
"Deep bump" = fast and meaningful connection enough to secure the next meeting and move on.
56% found their job trough a personal connection, study shows.
Weak ties: "weak ties" are generally more important than those you consider strong - when it comes to new jobs and new ideas and new information.
8 connector professions: restaurateurs, headhunters, lobbyists, fund-raisers, PR-people, politicians, journalists and authors/bloggers/gurus
"Mix it up. Hunt out people who look and act and sound nothing like you do. Seek out ideas from people you don't ordinarily talk to who inhabit professional worlds you don't ordinarily travel in connect with the connectors" p.145
Conversation as a skill: it can be learned.
Health, wealth and children --> deep emotional bonds
Micro celebrity: not famous among millions, but famous among the people who are important for your mission.
GVAC: Generosity + vulnerability + accountability + candor = trust
"People are desperate for authenticity" p.251
What's got your attention Write about that.
"The best ideas come from looking around you and constantly asking, 'how can I be helpful to people'"
Become the king of content.
Create "luck" and engineer serendipity:
Productivity and innovation tracks with population growth: different people --> different ideas --> different opportunities --> meetings with other people
"Third spaces": bars, coffee shops etc. where people seek community.
Everything accelerates: Problem: knowledge becomes obsolete and globalization leads to competition; how quickly can you know the new and right things Answer: By creating serendipity and connecting people --> massive value
"Your goal as you move through the world should be to create a force field inside of which people feel safe to play by different rules. Model the traits that support serendipity - curiosity, generosity, passion, and humility. Create social opportunities, like the dinners.., and allow others to build trust" p.260
Passion --> energy --> enthusiasm (so cultivate passion)
Relationship action plan (RAP):
Study: 86% credited their success to being "open to new things and people" p.263
Conferences/workshops are not for sitting and listening, it's about connecting with people.
1. Trends and opportunities on the cutting edge (analyze)
2. Ask seemingly stupid questions
3. Know yourself and your talents
4. Always learn
5. Stay healthy
6. Expose yourself to unusual experiences
7. Don't get discouraged
8. Know the new technology
9. Develop a niche
10. Follow the money
"Regardless of age, regardless of position, regardless of the business we happen to be in, all of us need to understand the importance of branding. We are the CEOs of our own companies: Me Inc. To be in business today, our most important job is to be head marketer for the brand called You." T.Peters p.290
"Create your own microequivalent of the Nike swoosh" T.Peters p.291
"In terms of branding, then, the bottom line for everyone comes down to a choice: to be distinct or extinct." p.292
"Be the CEO of your own life. Raise hell. Let the chips fall where they may." T.Peters p.292